I had no idea...

... that first grade would be even harder than kindergarten. Kindergarten (time-wise) wasn't much different than preschool. Jacob went to school two more times each week, but was still jumping off the bus to me by noon and we had the whole day ahead of us. Plus, kindergarten is such a fun year... full of parties and class books and art projects and singing and pure cuteness. I was so sad to see last year come to an end.

It's such a weird feeling. When I was working part-time, I ached to be home with my boys. Now that I am finally home, Jacob will be at school full-time... and I know my heart will ache for him again. I just can't picture my life without my six-year old all day. The house is going to be so quiet, because Jacob is the one asking me questions and telling me how much he loves me all day long. It also breaks my heart to think of Gavin without his big brother around. They have spent their whole lives together pretending, working on puzzles, coloring, playing computer games... inseparable. I guess it's time for Gavin to bond with his little brother now. ;)

I had no idea when I was a first grade teacher. NO idea. I saw the eyes of my students' moms brimming with tears and I thought I understood. I didn't though... not until I had one of my own. A little baby who jolted me with an unfathomable love the moment I held him for the first time. A little boy whose smile, laughter, and hugs fill my heart with the most amazing joy. I watched Jacob sing his first song, finish his first puzzle, read his first book. I took pictures as he rode his bike for the first time, made it across the monkey bars, lost his first tooth. I hugged him after every skinned knee, every shot, every time he got his feelings hurt. Tomorrow will be another milestone as I watch him step onto the bus for his very first day of first grade. Not without a tear or two I'm sure. :(

Jacob had open house last night. It was so sweet watching him on his Daddy's lap, listening to his teacher. There was a little boy named Ryan who immediately ran up to him and introduced himself. He wanted Jacob to sit by him at lunch on the first day and be his science buddy. :) So now Jacob is super excited to start school and see his new friend!



I am so glad he is excited, but I sure am going to miss this boy!