Court

Court was... everything I thought it would be.  Intimidating.  Nerve-wracking.  Overwhelming.  Scary.  The Russian judge was barely older than we were, but he was all business.  You couldn't get a feel for what he was thinking at all.  There were only five people in the room besides us... the judge, two caretakers from the orphanage, the prosecutor, and the secretary.  We all stood when he entered the room.  I tried to catch his eye and give him a friendly smile, but there was no reciprocation.  The judge looked over our papers while rubbing his forehead and finally looked up to explain our rights.  I thought there would be some pausing as our representative translated, but she just translated right over the judge as he spoke.  Since she is soft-spoken and difficult to hear as it is, it was almost impossible to understand what was going on.

Then there were the questions.  OH, the questions.  Let's just say he didn't understand AT ALL why we would want to adopt when we already have three biological kids.  Wasn't our family already big enough?  Why didn't we just have a fourth biologically?  Was this some kind of humanitarian effort?  Wow.  I didn't know what answer he was looking for, but we just wanted to give this baby girl a mommy... a daddy...  big brothers...  a home... stability... compassion... love.   Why was that so hard to understand?  Thankfully, after about 45 minutes of questioning, the caregivers stood up to give their recommendation.  They told the judge how happy our little girl was when we played with her, that they could see the love we already have for her, and that she would be far better off going to the United States with a family than staying in a Russian orphanage.  The prosecutor, after hearing what we had to say, also stood and recommended for this adoption to be approved.  Then everyone left the room except the judge.

We were invited back in about five minutes later.  I thought when the judge gave us his verdict it would be crystal clear.  It wasn't.  We just had such a hard time understanding our interpreter while the judge spoke simultaneously.  However, when he was done speaking, our interpreter said, "Congratulations!"  And we knew.  We knew this little girl we had fallen in love with was ours forever. 

We waited outside the room in complete relief and indescribable joy as our friends went into the courtroom.  This same judge had approved another adoption for them about eighteen months ago, so we felt confident that they would find favor with him again.  They did!  What happened next is a moment that I will remember for the rest of my life.  I don't know why it meant so much to me but it did.  This judge, who seemed so cold and emotionless in the courtroom, came outside and shook our hands.  A simple, firm handshake of congratulations.  For a moment, I thought of the whole situation from his perspective.  The life of this little girl was in his hands.  He had to put his trust in us, when there have been some families in the United States who have broken that trust.  One little boy who was abused and killed in his home.  One little boy who was shipped back to Russia in an airplane.  I felt like when he shook my hand, he was saying that he trusted us to love and care for this little girl for the rest of her life.  I was so grateful to him.  His decision changed the life of our little girl forever.

Then we went back to the orphanage to see our daughter!  It was the first time I could call her that!  The interesting thing is it didn't change how we felt about her because we were already head over heels in love.  We fell in love the first time we laid eyes on her little referral picture.  The only thing it did change was our fears about losing her.  We knew that up until the court date, she could be taken away at any time.  Another Russian family could adopt her.  Russia could get so frustrated with United States that they could close adoptions with us altogether.  So many things could have happened and we were trying to guard our hearts just in case.  After court, we could finally let our guard down.  We didn't have to worry about losing her anymore.  She was officially ours!

Since we had spent so much time with her the day before, we immediately continued on where we had left off.  Playing and hugging and kissing and giggling.  I didn't feel the emotion of saying goodbye that I did on the first trip.  Because I knew that in ten short days she would be in our arms forever.  We are bringing her home on Christmas Eve... and there are no words to describe how excited we are!!!!